An article that has changed our home

I've never read one article that really made me change my behavior quite so drastically as the one I'm about to post.  Perhaps I read it at the right time, when God was already pulling at my heart on this issue, but it really struck home, and has drastically changed me.  I stumbled across it one day while I was eating my lunch. 

http://www.handsfreemama.com/2013/05/22/the-important-thing-about-yelling/

I have always struggled with yelling.  It's my go-to when I'm stressed, frustrated, and frazzled.  It comes naturally for me.  I've always said I'm "trying to work on it", yet I've still gone back to it in times of frustration.  However, after reading this article, I have almost completely STOPPED yelling.  I've honestly yelled maybe a few times in the past month.  I've changed the way I speak to my children, and you know what... in turn, they have changed the way they speak to me and each other.  It's amazing how much your own attitude affects your whole home. 

I realized the times I yell most are when I'm frustrated, in a hurry, or busy.  So I've been extra vigilant with my attitude during those times.  I've calmly explained to my children why I may be frustrated at that moment, and that sometimes I just need a moment to compose myself, and they seem to get it, and then in turn help me or obey. 

I just can't tell you how much better the whole atmosphere in our home is.  In not letting myself yell I haven't actually gotten as upset over things.  I've been able to take a few deep breaths, stay more calm and just not let things get to me so much.

I have always wanted our home to be one where everyone practices grace with each other.  I want kind and loving correction, and tones that help and not hurt.  Yelling erases all of that.  With the absence of yelling, the things I have wanted have actually taken place.  Amazing how just changing one thing, has really changed my heart, and our entire home.

I'm so grateful for reading that article that day, and having the Lord help me change a nasty habit.  I will tell you, after this wonderful change in our home, I don't ever want to go back to my yelling/frazzled ways again.


Comments

Christy said…
Hey Jess,
That was a great article and I love how when we are transparent we can love each other up, encourage one another in The Lord and just be each others cheering section so we can be the best mamas we can be. I too am working on this area, trying to show grace to myself when I come up short and keep my eyes focused on Christ who is the perfect role model. :)
Teresa DiMillo said…
Wow Jess, that's awesome. The article made me cry. I, too am a yeller, and I, too always say I'm working on it. I have gotten better, but I still find I yell more than I'd like. I need to work harder. I'm so proud of your epiphany. I'll be there too one day, with God's grace.
Your words are so refreshingly honest. And I couldn't agree more, God had been paving the way. And the article was probably the tipping point I'm sure. About six months ago, God put his finger on this issue in my heart too. I have been developing the habit of asking the Holy Spirit to help me before I choose anger (because a lot of times it's a choice to "go there") & it's like I feel him helping me choose self-control. And I've also been able to see what brings me to that super-icky-crazy stressful place (hello over-commitment!) and make changes to usher in that "peace" into our home. Maybe my favorite blog you've ever posted. Love you mucho!

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